Lyrics

I love this band! gotta listen to them sometime!

One Day Of The Week

I look into the eyes of you, I see the things you don't want me to
The things that you try to hide, but don't you know, I look deep inside

Cuz, I see through the games that you play
When you go to church on Sunday
You put on your mask and you think it's all right to be a Christian one day of the week

God looks into they heart of you, He sees your life, it's black as night
But if you ask Him inside, you will find, that He will wash your sins clean and white

God's not there to condemn you, He just wants to let you know
That if you choose to follow Him, He'll never let you go

But it's not right to be a Christian one day of the week

Reason

The world is turning in front of me and sometimes it's hard for me to let go
My flesh begins to rise and then I find out there's things I don't know
I'm standing here, but no one cares, I'm crying out, but no one's there
And I am me, but who am I, and will I ever find a reason for life

But I see You there, Your arms around me
And I have no fear, You're all around me, You're all around me
You're all around

On this earth people live and die, wondering why (I wonder why)
They go through life feeling lost, never knowing who paid the cost
Lord, give me the strength to find the faith in this world
Help them to see, the light in me, even though I'm so afraid (of it all)

And I am so afraid, then I remember the price You paid
You're all around me, You're all around me



Run To You

I'm feeling so inspired about the love that pours over me
And I can't describe it, as You over overwhelm my soul

And right now I come before You
To praise the name that gives me life

And every time I run to You, You're there for me
And every time I have a wound inside You heal, You heal

And right now, in this silence, I feel my heart draw near to You

Marriage Under Fire.

I have noticed lately an attack on the front lines of the american family marriages seem to be under attack so much that 50% will not last. Mostly because of differences the couple was unable to work out. Now i know there are ligit reasons to get divorced (if you've been cheated on or abused to name two). I looked around my church's congregation today and saw too many women crying or standing alone next to their kids trying to hold back the tears. My heart cried out to God " WHAT IS GOING ON?" I knew instantly that the enemy has put marriage under fire because if he can hurt the relationship that keeps a family together than he can hurt the whole family. and if the whole family (the kids and parents) are hurt they will hurt others when they grow up. It is only natural that if people feel abandoned, unloved, or guilty as a child they will continue that through to their marriages in the future. It said that within the church we still have 50% divorce rate. Its sucks that the church is under more attack when it comes to this issue because the enemy doesn't want us focused on God..he wants us to focus on our troubles, and how hard things are in our lives so that we blame God. Let me just say..pray for the nation's married couples i know it's hard to have such a close relationship and have to deal with finances and every day things. I pray that more people realize the fire they are under so they can fix it before it's too late and the nation's family has become something only in fairy tales.
God Loves you.. and he sees that you are hurt. He sees everything and wants you to know he can help mend your family. Really! My heart cries for this nation and their negitivity towards marriage.

Secured by ADT

Ryan has been a little paranoid lately that all his cool and expensive stuff will be stolen.Let alone his number one bestest friend would be hurt by some horrible intruder. so..he's been pricing things and got a great deal from ADT. So today the guy came to install it and showed us how to use it.
Now maybe he won't be so anxious all the time. maybe he can go to sleep actually not worried about it. maybe now he can know its safe to leave me alone. :-)
and when i watch america's most wanted and get freaked out i will know i'm a little bit more safe at night! YAY!

sounds funny but its true.

SORRY FOLKS

DELETED!

my 2006 summer anthem!

Your 2006 Summer Anthem Is

Dani California by the Red Hot Chili Peppers "She's a lover, baby, and a fighter Shoulda seen it comin' when it got a little brighter With a name like "Dani California" Day was gonna come when I was gonna mourn ya A little loaded she was stealin' another breath I love my baby to death"

What's Your 2006 Summer Anthem?

Down the Yellow Brick Road...And Back...

I just love these people. I spent a 3 1/2 day weekend with them.. Had a blast..Drank a little too much...Sobered up a bit after a sad ending... Then left. I love North Carolina. I want to go back... Anita and I have decided it's an anual event to have the weird expierences of North Carolina. It's a bit like going to OZ and back... only instead of yellow brick it's red dirt.

Here's a few things i learned down there:

~I'm "SOO GOTH" (says a "goth" himself)
~Humidity makes anita's hair fill my car...
~Andrew likes to play "the game" with guys..."GAAAY"
~Sarah and Sara like to wear little clothes.. i tried.. it just didn't work for me!
~Red slushies turn your teeth red
~Jack is definatly not WACK!
~The Girl Next Door is just not a movie we can get through.. at least not with Jack.
~8 bottles of beer can be a little much for some people.
~I HEART cute cowboys who know how to dance.
~A front porch can be a great place to relax/ talk/ be drunk on.
~Watch out... mood changes can be tragic...
~Andy will always take care of Nita...no matter what!
~Andrew's mom is a GOOD COOK!!!
~Andrew like two girls in his bed at one time!

Yes. This was the Yellow Brick Road lined with poppies we were soo lucky to travel this past weekend! We had a blast andrew! thanks for the place to stay, and fun memories!

Life Coach Tip of the Week...Brought to you by Jet-Dry

So starting over is my current favorite TV show. I watch it everyday when i get home from work. Every week they have a life coach tip of the week. Here's what this week's is. I thought it profound.

"Let the past be the past. Don't keep remembering, repeating, reconnecting with what you THINK went wrong. Let go, be free because the past has already passed by"

As the thunder cracks i think to myself. Wow! that's so what i need to hear. Though I don't want to. It's sooo true. WHY CAN'T I GET OVER THE PAST???? WHY CAN'T I JUST STOP THIS? but then i know why. Because i catch myself thinking .."i really just want to think about it...then maybe it will still be real to me..maybe then i can still live the past a little..even if i can't really live it." it's kinda sick but i like feeling the pain of the past. I actually miss it a little if i don't think about the past hurts i have a few times a day. aagghhh. I'm soo in a habit it's not even funny. I don't know how to train myself to not think about it. Because if i think about not thinking about it then i'm thinking about it by default right? right. What do i do? i need a life coach to help me through it. maybe i'll get on starting over.. no maybe i won't...lol! eh..dunno would you support me if iwent on starting over? i have a few things i want to work on...here's the list..

1. Budgeting
2. Getting over the past
3. Being a "grown ass woman" aka...take responsility and not procrastinating
4. Being honest with people it's hard to be honest fully with..aka my husband.
5. Gaining respect enough for myself to speak up for myself and not get trampled on by people i'm too afraid to speak up to.
6. Dealing with my heart problems..aka actually crying and greaving and accepting that i really am sick and because of it i can't have my own kids, that i may go down hill and eventually i will die because of it. Basically dealing with my fears.

is that enough to get on a show about changing your life and starting over?
i guess i could just try.. i mean it i'm sick of having the same sh*t go through my mind..over and over and over agian...

Crazy Times Man!

So, this was my night..waiting in line for "cheap gas" listen to the audio!

Check it out!

So tonight i helped my friend bridget with her blog. you should check it out.. just remember it's still under construction!
love you all!

IT'S THE BIGGEST GAMER DAY EVER!

Since i got home an hour and a half ago i've watched g3 which is the gamer's network on cable. Can i tell you it must be the biggest day in gaming history. at E3 which i guess is the gammer's convention about the latest coolest things comming out this year. The Nintindo WII looks really cool actually. But there is like no real information that's been given out. My husband wants a PS3... i think that's what it was. That's like $600. he says he'll save up for it. Why can't we save up for a nice HONEYMOON??? lol we haven't had that yet! that would be nice! ooh well! lol i'm a game widow. so sad!

T.V.~ What a distraction

I often wonder if my world would crash in around me if i didn't have TV. Honestly i don't know if it would. I know i'd miss my shows that i watch almost daily. but really, TV is just a distraction. A huge distraction that makes me sooo lazy! i live with people around who have the TV on as background noise. I think really it just annoys me... My dog freaking knows me and my husband's schedule by what TV is on. How crazy is that?! If i spent as much time with God instead of watching TV maybe i'd be even closer than i am to him. I dunno...maybe i'm just ranting because there's a TV right next to me on for background noise while the pups battle it out in a barking match on the other side of me...talk about headach!

yeah, we have cake!

this was at my youth church. we had a going away/ happy birthday party for kelly! you can hear rick saying "yeah we have cake!!"

What my boring life is made of

my first audio post

Here's Boo... to tell all!

Okay, so yes i have a xanga but my sister showed me how easy this blogger thing was and I wanted one! so here I am blogger world! I love you already!